Created: May 30, 2000
To the tune of "Gangsta's Paradise", but "Amish Paradise" is closer.. go grab the mp3 and sing along!
As I walk through the world where I harvest my pain I took a look at my wife and realise she's quite profane but that's just perfect for an Splurgoth like me You know I shun pleasant things like humility. At 4:30 in the morning I'm takin' gals Jebediah feeds the fighters and Jacob chows... fool And I've been stealin' and killin' so long that Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone I'm a thing of the land, I'm into discipline Got a scepter in my hand and a arm on my chin But if I finish my fun and you finish thine Then tonight we're going to party like it's 9099 We've been spending most our lives Living in an Splurgoth paradise I've churned players once or twice Living in an Splurgoth paradise It's hard work and sarcrifice Living in an Splurgoth paradise We sell guns at retail price Living in an Splurgoth paradise A local boy kicked me in the butt last week I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek I really don't care, in fact I wish him well 'Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he's fighting in hell But I've ever ate a tourist if he really deserved it An Splurgoth with no 'tude? You know that's unheard of I never wear buttons but I got some mad fat And my homies agree I really look good in that If you come to visit, you'll be moved to tears We haven't had a main course in 300 beers But we ain't really bad, so please don't point and stare We're just mannerallery impaired There's no life, no fun, no food or drink Not a single luxury Unlike Robinson Caruso It's as advanced as can be We been spending most our lives Living in an Splurgoth paradise We're just dangerous and hungry guys Living in an Splurgoth paradise There's always time for sin and vice Living in an Splurgoth paradise We don't fight, we obliterate Living in an Splurgoth paradise Hitchin' up the spaceship, growin' lots of blubber Raised a army Monday, soon I'll raise another Think you're really evil? Think you're black in heart? Well, I know I'm a million times as horrid as thou art I'm the evil guy that the Old Ones wanna be like On my knees day and night stealin' points for the everlife So don't be vain and don't be whiny Or else, my brother, I might have to get medieval on your heinie. We been spending most our lives living in an Splurgoth paradise We're just love to terrorize Living in an Splurgoth paradise There's no cops or traffic lights Living in an Splurgoth paradise But you'd probably think it bites Living in an Splurgoth paradise
Splurgoth_Paradise.php -- Revised: January 27, 2021.