Player Blunders

By: Doctor Hermann Bang
Created on: January 24, 1999

Sneak, a character owned by a friend of my GMs, was a 12th-level spy with a prowl skill something like 140% (trust me) - plus with the added benefits of cutting-edge stealth tech and ninja training he acquired somewhere along the line, this guy could stand in front of you and you wouldn't even know he was there. Anyway, he got cocky one day and started bad-mouthing mages in a Tolkeen bar. This mage overheard and demanded that he take back the insults - which Sneak didn't. "And what are you going to do about it?" was all he managed to say before a magical incantation and a bright flash threw him to the ground. The mage got away clean, and Sneak showed no signs of injury. He put it down to experience and forgot about it... until a week or so later, when he was in the process of stealing a prototype super-SAMAS (this was back before they went into mass-production) from a fairly well-guarded CS compound. He managed to WALK all the way to the right storage hangar without so much as an encounter - just from picking his path well - until he had to get past the door guards. So he waits and waits, picks his moment, rolls to prowl and heads on in...then all of a sudden, this music started up from out of nowhere. Sort of like 'Da, da, da-da-da, da, da, da-da-da...' It was the theme from Mission Impossible! Desperately, he stole away and tried again. This time he rolled an 02, almost perfect - and the music was even louder. It woke up the entire compound and Sneak was forced to flee for the first time in many, many years. The music was a curse put on him by the aforementioned mage (surprise!), which he never found the power to remove. He eventually gave up spying and became a headhunter... a sad twist for a career thief, indeed.


One player had a HU character who was so ignorant of firearms as to attempt playing Russion Roulette with an automatic - a Glock 17, to be precise. Now that's what I call the ultimate headjob.


Ever rolled a 1 to throw a grenade? Moonshadow, the fastest mutant in the west, once did this - he held the grenade and threw the pin. Upon realising his mistake, he tried to lob the grenade at his opponent before it went off - and rolled a 1 again. It bounced off a nearby gutter and landed in his lap. Damn lucky he was wearing body armour...


Blades, being a member of the Lazlo defence forces, once gave Arl Xzzyn (did I spell that right?) a lovely gold pre-Rifts watch (genuine article - he pulled it out of a dimension-hop) as a birthday present. I went one better and sent Arl an opal-encrusted flea collar. I had NO idea that Wolfen were so touchy about personal hygiene. My GM actually took ten minutes off to think up a suitable punishment that Mr. Xzzyn could arrange for me...

Player_Blunders.php -- Revised: January 27, 2021.