Ghoull's Guide for Taking
Everyone Else Down with You!
Sometimes, you may get the impression that your GM is trying to assassinate your character. This fun guide
gives you a few artistic and humorous ways to turn the tables. Although the GM will probably still kill you no
matter what, this gives you the chance to make him work really hard for it.
- Carry around LOTS of explosives duct taped to your
body. When you get the sense that death is imminent, pull the pin,
and hug either the attacker or your friends.
- NEVER, EVER, EVER leave the other group members. If
you are left alone, the GM will take you out with a big, area-effect
weapon. Remember, the GM probably wants to spare the innocent
players, so sticking around them is probably the best plan.
- Drag the other characters into fights with your
prospective assassins. Maneuver so that they are in the assassin's
line of fire, and are likely to be hit by his shots. This way, the other
players have to help you if they want to survive.
- This one's plain ol' common sense, but I'll put it
in anyway. When you get the sense that death is imminent, let loose
with everything you've got. To hell with ammo and PPE and ISP because
you won't enjoy them for much longer. Spectacular area-effect
weapons work best, especially if you've followed instruction B+C
and your friends are within range.
- Another neat trick is to make sure that anything
the group needs to complete the adventure is on your body. This way,
even though you may get smoked, they'll never beat the game.
Example: "Whew, I'm sure glad that the
Sunaj which had been stalking us finally got rid of that jerk
Paul. Now, where's the key we need to get into this treasure room
where the princess and a billion credits are?"
"Um...Paul had them."
"Oh. Where's Paul's body?"
"You're breathing it. That friggin' Sunaj used a long-range proton missile."
"Crap."
- Be sure to turn off the safeties of everything you
own which has a nuclear engine. This way, when your friends start looting
your stuff, the one who takes your vehicle gets a kiloton right in
the face as soon as he turns the key.
- When you've run out of tricks, take your own
character's life before you let the GM do it. Perhaps carrying around Dr.
Kevorkian's Suicide Machine would be a good idea, so that you can
"go with dignity" instead of on the business end of some assassin's
las-rifle.
---Ghoull
Date: Wed, 25 Sep 1996
Composed by: Manuel Haendler.
You can reach him at the following address.
Haend@worldnet.att.net
Dying_with_Style.php -- Revised: January 27, 2021.