RIFTS by D ustin M.  
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Most Common Last Words...

MOST COMMON LAST WORDS OF RIFTS PLAYERS AND CHARACTERS

1. Super Samas? Hmmph, all Samas' suck!
2. He's unarmed? Ok, I want to kill him in hand to hand.
3. I'll let it hit me, my armour has lots of MDC
4. I'm saving that spell for when I REALLY need it.
5. What new CS army?
6. Phase Technology, why would I need that? My NG ion pistol works just fine.
7. Dragon, Schmagon, I've got a plan.
8. Trust me, I know what I am doing.
9. 30 seconds till the nuke goes off? Ah, plenty of time. I lean back and crack open a beer.
10. Xitixic are from the first book, before everything got powerful, they're no threat.
11. CHARGE!
12. No worries, my E-clip is full.
13. I go talk to the mysterious figure in the black cloak, sitting at that table in the dark corner of the bar.
14. Let me think about this for a second. What table in the dark corner of the bar?
15. Let me think about this for a second.
16. Click? What click? I didn't hear anything?
17. Don't worry, I've got the security systems skill.
18. No prob, I'll only fail if I roll a 1.
19. My gun does 4d6x1000 MD!!!! There is no way this guy is gonna survive.
20. Hey guys, look what I found! Mjolnir, Thor's hammer!
21. Where did that Splugorth come from and why is he foaming at the mouth?
22. Don't worry, they wouldn't bother to trap this way in.
23. We'll take them completely by surprise!
24. Ok, this is what my character is gonna do. I'm gonna jump from the plane, grab the Samas by its arm, put a fusion block in its intake, jump away out of the blast radius, make my body flat so I fall slower, then touch my summon griffon tatoo, land on it, and fly away. (this has actually been attempted)
25. Don't worry, hearing our plans won't affect what the GM does, he is impartial!
26. Hey there <insert your GM's name>, what are you grabbing all those dice for?
27. Hey there <insert your GM's name>, what are you grabbing all those dice for?
28. Let him cast the spell, it can't affect me.
29. Psionics are nothing compared to my Robot's 600 missiles! Hey, what does Tele-mechanics do anyways?
30. They won't find us, I covered our tracks.
31. <insert your GM's name>, you have no idea what you are doing.
32. Dude, I'd rather piss on your ashes than dance on your grave.
33. Your momma!
34. Those vampires can't get in here, all we have to do is wait till daylight. Hey, where did all this mist come from?
35. I pull my gun before he draws his.
36. Badges? We don' need no steenkeen badges!
37. You want to try that stuff with me tough guy?
38. CS juicers? Yeah right, those are illegal!
39. <mutant character newly rifted from Heroes Unlimited>: let's go to this Chi-Town everyone keeps telling us about. They sound like good people.
40. What do ya mean "my fly is down"? good people.
41. What do ya mean "my fly is down"?
42. Hah! My plane can fly faster than the missiles!
43. Ever notice how the GM never makes any of our equipment break down?
44. Stop whining, my 6th Sixth Sense power will give us plenty of warning.
45. He won't be expecting this!
46. That's not what it says on page 65 of the rule book :P
47. Don't forget, all body armour comes with radiation shielding.
48. Time to sit back and have a smoke.
49. Remember the Allamo!
50. My character goes and hits on the good looking woman at the bar <come on, we all know that women will be the death of us all>
51. You worry too much, I checked out this cyber-doc's credentials it isn't a chop shop...
52. With this magic item, my character is now INVINCIBLE!
53. Anyone else smell something burning?
54. What does "engarde, my sword is a soudrinker" mean?
55. Can't we all just get along?
56. I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
57. Ewwwww...look at me, I'm so scared.
58. What kinda stupid name is "Pogtal" for a race?
59. Now was it throw the grenade ON three, or count three THEN throw it?
60. So, like, are all you Amazons lesbians or what?
61. Why did I have to put all my magic weapon tattoos on my butt?
62. Ok, so I was wrong, your gun IS bigger than mine...
63. Uuuuuummmmmmmm...why didn't my missile hurt him?
64. I think this is the way out...
65. I'm gonna try and pick his pocket.
66. Geeze, nothing seems to be a challenge for my 8th level Cosmo-Knight anymore
67. Are we gonna let him get away with saying that? LET'S GET HIM BOYS!
68. <1st level vagabond to Dog Boy> meet any good hydrants lately?
69. This isn't AD&D, nobody casts protective spells on their equipment.
70. <in a secret note to GM> when it is my turn for guard duty, I am going to sneak away with all the party's money.
71. Oh yeah? I bet my character could kick your character's ass!
72. No sweat boys, my dodge bonus is high enough.
73. <male player to female player> wanna go in the kitchen and grab some chips for us? thanks babe.
74. Guns don't jam in Rifts, look in the main book, there are no rules for it.
75. Oh shit.
76. What are you guys afraid of? Its only a group of faeries...
77. Hey kid, put that down, it's not a toy. ZAP!
78. Man, even for a Dragon you're ugly.
79. Women players don't have the right mentality to play Rifts.
80. How much? 750,000! For that piece of crap? Later ya cheat, you aren't the only Splugorth arms merchant on Phase World.
81. You wouldn't hit a guy with glasses would ya?
82. Allright, I've almost reached the top of the cliff. <to GM> I just got to make one more climbing role, right?
83. <player fighting Kittani serpent armour to GM> What do ya mean they've got autododge?
84. Ok, my city-rat sneaks up on Odin and gives him a death blow!
85. Come on, the campaign just started, you seriously think the GM is going to throw anything hard at us this early?
86. Geez I'm bored, when is it my turn to do something?
87. Is it just me, or did it get real quiet all of a sudden?
88. Ah, its just a red herring the GM made up to scare us.
89. Fire elemental? No prob, I pull out my TW water pistol and roll for initiative.
90. <one player to another> NPC my character for a second, I got to go to the bathroom.
91. Lightning spells never strike the same place twice.
92. My character has a horror factor, I'll try and scare the CS troops away.
93. I take my armour off and go to sleep.
94. <player to GM> You want to know who was walking last in the group?
95. Glitterboys suck! They don't even get missiles!
96. Honest, I wasn't reading the adventure. The book just fell off the table and flipped to that page when I picked it up.
97. How deadly can the Pecos Kingdom be, Palladium hasn't even done a book on it yet!
98. I go up to the crazy and play with the knobs coming out of his head.
99. I don't care how much MDC it has, it shouldn't have pissed me off!
100. Geez, does this GM ever like to power trip.
101. I'm not leaving till I kill something.
102. Are you looking at me?
103. Ow.
104. ALL D-Bees are Superior to humans, right?
105. That's Cheap!
106. I Tell the witch to suck On her third nipple.
107. I leap through the rift.
108. Mega juicer? No problem, I take out My Wilks laser pistol and blow his fracking S.D.C. Head off.
109. I try to Score with the blind warrior slaves of Splurgoth.
110. I tell him to kiss my @$$.
111. <A D-Bee talking to the GM> Who cares about the CS? I tell them I'm Just looking around.
112. Its a Fireproof suit, And I'm Sure plasma is like M.D. Fire.

1 - 103 by the great Steven Trustrum, 94trustr@scar.utoronto.ca
104 - 112 by RedNexus@aol.com

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