Adventure Logs
Bad Rifts Stories
Oh look, LeO the Lion! Grr!
Subject: [pal][Bad Rifts stories] Oh look, LeO the Lion! Grr! Date: 2/1/99 9:43 AM Received: 2/1/99 10:20 PM From: Paladin ShadowWalker, paladin_shadowwalker@yahoo.com To: List, palladium@dante.neonexus.com
Sigh.
Well, I'm back from my unwilling hiatus (between exams and the weekend, I was unable to do mail for the last, oh, two weeks...give or take.), with a wonderful 'Those Stupid Players' story to tell.
The campaign was relatively simple: the characters were playing special forces cops (Anti-Supernatural and Paranormal: ASP) in a city I had created. I suppose I should have realized that the game wasn't going to work out when they nicknamed their squadron 'The BAD ASPs'.
It gets worse.
Simple start. They each share an apartment and a Rolling Thunder APV with their partner. The teams were: Mark (A Sea Inquisitor) and Brian (A Police Officwer (NGR)), Mike(a Zapper) and John (A CS RPA), and another player who is relatively innocent-for once. I told them they had just woken up, and had twenty minutes to get to work: easy enough.
Mike started off by describing everything he was doing: to the meticulous detail. "I get out of bed, go to the dresser, and look at my clothes. Finding something that appeals to me, I then go to the kitchen, open the cupboard, and get out a box of cereal and a bowl. Then I open the refrigerator, get out a gallon of milk..." Etc.
Then Brian joined in, doing the same thing. GM (that's me) overrides them and tells 'em to knock it off. So John wakes up, late.
Big trouble. He decides he has a hovercycle. I say he doesn't. So he runs down the hallway (Mike on his shoulders, making siren noises), acting like he was on a cycle.
As soon as he hit the stairs, Mike's head hit the doorjamb, knocking him off. Newton's law, John went forward, down the stairs.
Mark states that his character, knowing this would likely happen (as usual), left an hour ago. With the car.
Brian's character realizes that he's late, and runs out (stepping over Mike, and running over John). He's halfway down the street when Mark picks him up, having run out to get donuts.
Mike wakes up, produces a gold pocket watch, and yelps "I'm late! I'm late for a very important date!" kicks John up, jumps on his shoulders again, and runs outside. Then he jumps off his shoulders and goes for the Rolling Thunder. John keeps going.
Halfway down the street, in the fast lane, John is slowing up traffic. "Folks, if you'll just go *around* the hovercycle, there'll be no problem..."
A LEO (beat cop), shows up. He's not happy. LEOs and ASP troopers don't get along very well.
Mike shows up and grabs John shortly before the LEO enacts the GMs vengeance (had a TX-30 locked on Jophn's unprotected head...and I was getting pissed enough to pull the trigger, too.)
They were about five feet away when a car passed through the spot where John's 'hovercycle' was. Mike jumps out of the car and writes some poor sap of a driver a ticket for hitting the cycle. The cop kicks him into the car. Off to work.
Things get worse. About this time, Mark, the person, was flipping through some porn that John brought from Las Vegas. His 7-8 year old nephew walks in to ask a question. Mark panicked.
After we were done laughing (about twenty minutes...at least), we got on with the game. A noisy coinversation with a sarcastic police chief later, they get the mission: investigate a magic user hiding in the sewers. Brian decides that his character will immediately run down to the Morgue to ask the ME for help (Brian had stated before this game his intentions to seduce Scarpetta, the chief Medical Examiner...and a necromancer. Oy.) She isn't in. So, he and Mark get one of the police wizards, and starts off to the scene. John and Mike are in the library, checking records: then John goes down to the main floor to get a psi-sensitive.
Halfway to the crime scene, Brian has frightened the crap out of the magic user, who teleports to safety. He and Mark turn back.
John makes the mistake of insulting the sensitive, who then blows him off. Angered, John starts making fun of LeOs in general.
"Oh look at me, I'm Leo the Liion. Grr!"
One brawl later, the chief kicks him out of the jail: he was frightening the prisoners.
Game pause as the GM can't control the players, and they go wild. Mike continually says that he wants to challenge the leader of the Leos to a fist fight, and that he's gonna bring a knife. Insert jokes about 'Rifts Side Story' here.
About this time, Mark got bored and said that his character commited suicide. Then he tries to switch characters and be a dragon ray...
"Look! A Dragon Ray with the donuts!"
I tried to ignore it, busy trying to overwhelm the cries of "ASP!" "LEO!" and halfhearted singing of the songs from West Side Story.
Five minutes later...
"WHAT THE HELL? I'm DEAD, hanging from the rafters, with a gunshot wound to the head! Can't anyone solve my murder?!"
The game deteriorates into a mess. Sigh. We spent the rest of the night cracking bad jokes.
In other news...anyone wanna play in a P-BeM?
-----(A very disgruntled) Paladin ShadowWalker
LeO_the_Lion.php -- Revised: March 24, 2007.
